An inside look of a Christian parent to a young adult

You have that one child who for some odd reason can't stand you anymore.

You feel it in the way they talk and their actions

You stand there and look at them and wonder...what have I done to you that makes you hate us?

You try to talk with them while they shrug their shoulders and mumble nothing yet their stance is full of suppressed irritation making you feel as if you are in the wrong

A whole myriad of emotions goes through you from wanting to cry to wanting to slap them across their face to yell and say, "Who do you think you are? I gave BIRTH TO YOU! I provided THIS! I provided THAT! I tried my BEST! I brought you to SUNDAY SCHOOL! I brought you to YOUTH! and yet you stand here making me feel as if I am the worse parent in the world while I have always tried to protect you and support you."

You begin to start second guessing yourself and wonder about your parenting skill until a sense of calm washes over you with a gentle voice saying, "That's exactly what you did wrong, you have stood time and time again for your child when you should have let them fall to learn to rise up and stand on their own."

Your heart breaks...

You stare off in the distance and struggle with the inner turmoil of "If I let them fall on their own, what will happen? Will they resent us (but your child resents you already)? Will they die in their backslidden condition?"

God certainly knows what we (you) are going through. After all, we were wayward kids to Him once.

I don't know what to say at this point because I'm angry, offended, hurt, sad...

And through these emotions and struggles, my husband texted me,

"We'll get through this"

All that I am...

All that I am is because of God.

Seriously, I'm having a tearful and greatful moment because I'm reflecting on recent events. I can't help it because I am looking back and I am amazed of where God has brought me from to where I am now.

Who wouldn't be in awe especially if He had to pick you up, dust you off, point to the mirror and tell you, "See that dirty girl (or guy)? You are beautiful...so why do you want to continually be dirty? Trust me and I'll create you to be more than you ever thought you could be."

I am blessed. Not because of me but because of Him.

All I can say is that I hope and pray that I will consistently shine for Him and that no one will stumble or fall because of my idiotic actions that does happen from time to time.